I love Real Estate. I love to buy houses. I like to sell houses. When I buy a drink, I like it to be on the house.

I’m always looking at the real estate listings, but you have to know how to read them because they use these secret codes.

They put in things that seem positive, but they’re not.

1) “Potential”


Translation: The yellow mold could potentially turn in to black mold.

2) “One of a kind”


Translation: The builder never made another one because he’s in prison.

3) “Cozy”


Translation: If you prefer the middle seat on an airplane, this is the place for you!

4) “Seller is motivated”


Translation: This house is currently on fire.


“Classic” means old.

“Retro” means old.

“Original” means old.

“Good Bones” means old bones.

“Newer” means about to be old.

…and since the video ends before Ellen starts dancing we here at Client Alchemist have you covered with this gif:


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